True Floridians...

JeffN

Active member
Member
Joined
Mar 6, 2001
RO Number
3672
Messages
1,369
You know you're a true Floridian if......

"Down South" means Key West

"Panhandling" means going to Pensacola.

You think no-one over 70 should be allowed to drive.

Flip-flops are everyday wear.

Shoes are for business meetings and church.

No, wait, flip flops are good for church too

Socks are only for bowling

Orange juice from concentrate makes you vomit

Tap water makes you vomit

Sweet tea can be served at any meal.

An alligator once walked through your neighborhood.

You smirk when a game show's "Grand Prize" is a trip to Florida.

You measure distance in minutes.

You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.

You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.

You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes

All the local festivals are named after a fruit.

A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.

A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.

Your winter coat is made of denim

You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites

You're younger than thirty but some of your friends are over 65

You know the four seasons really are: almost summer, summer,
not summer but really hot, and Christmas.

It's not "pop." It's "soda" or "coke."

Anything under 70 is chilly.

You've hosted a hurricane party.

You go to a theme park for an afternoon, and know when to get on the best rides.

You pass on the right and honk at the elderly and the Haitians doing 40mph in the fast lane on I-95

You understand the futility of exterminating cockroaches.

You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochee, Okahumpka and Loxahatchee.

You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat than have a boat yourself.

You've driven through Yeehaw Junction.

You were 8 before you realized they made houses without pools.

You were 12 when you first met someone who couldn't swim.

You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas

You know what the "stingray shuffle" is and why it's important!

You could swim before you could read

You have to drive north to get to The South

New ifs...
You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.

Every other house had blue roofs in 2004-2005

You have gotten out of school early on Halloween to trick or treat
before it got dark.

You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for

You dread lovebug season.

You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't
Hurricane Charley, Hurricane Frances...but Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne.

You know what a snowbird is and you hate them.

You know why flamingos are pink.

You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.

Street Racing is a way of life instead of a sport

You were twelve before you ever saw snow or you still haven't.
 
Excellent, Jeff. I had to check evey one but this one, "Shoes are for business meetings and church."...don't go to either.
 
Let us not forget that if your homeowners insurance was $1,400 last year it's $2,800 this year and you gotta beg to get it. Boat insurance is worse and if you get waked really, really bad the offending boat will have New Jersey written on the transom.
Mike, Palm Coast, FL
 
Great list and so true, although my homeowners insurance was 1,500 in 2005, 3,600 in 2006 and just renewed for 2007 for 7,300... Boat insurance has gone up also, with no claims...

JDH
 
You recognize the futility of bitching about insurance costs. The only way out is North Carolina.
 
I can tell you that I know ten friends of mine (all home owners) are trying to leave Florida, Georgia seems to be the most popular, large homes, acres, 5-20 for half of what it cost here, including insurance (both home and car), taxes and overall costs. Hell, my cleaning lady already purchased 10 acres in Georgia with a pond and a newly built house, tractor included. She used the equity from her home to purchase (for cash) that one, one the house sells here she is gone.

North Carolina, Tennessee, Arkansas and Nevada are other destinations my friends are relocating to. If things don’t change soon down here with taxes, insurance, cost of living, marinas, etc. we will all leave eventually…

JDH
 
I didn't think I could ever leave Florida, but after 30 years of ridiculous property tax and insurance rate increases, out-of-control population growth, watching most of Florida's natural beauty replaced by condos, malls, and pavement, navigating waterways clogged with boaters that know only how to operate a cell phone, and three direct hits by hurricanes in two years, I'm throwing in the towel. As soon as the housing market turns around, there will be one more waterfront home and a nice sportfisher listed. A package deal would be considered.

My wife is from Penn and misses the season changes. The only season changes I care about are NFL, PGA, USTA, Formula 1/Indy, when the snowbirds leave, and the sailfish, wahoo, tuna and dolphin action. However, in an effort to find a compromise, I agreed to look north of Jacksonville, as far as one tank of gas would take us. I have to be on the water and fresh water has never really appealed to me, but cleaning up after hurricanes has lost its novelty, so we decided to look at the big lakes along the SC-GA border, far enough inland that tropical storms would be seen only on the network news. Last summer we spent a couple of days exploring Hartwell Lake, near the foothills of the Smokies. We drove around it for two days and never even got to the north section near Clemson where we were later told was the most picturesque area. It was huge.

I was impressed with the lake’s beauty and the size of the boats in the marinas…80-100 ft houseboats and 35-50 ft Searays. I think could get used to having a 23 ft center console there. The waterfront property was at bargain prices compared to So. Fla., as were property taxes and insurance. Elevated one acre lots with great lake views and huge docks were common. The locals seemed like real friendly folks.

I’m still waiting for the downside. I’m thinking it must have to do with the thermometer. No one mentioned earthquakes and I can deal with the culture shock. Heck, I may even learn to enjoy watching rednecks going in left circles…NASCAR I believe they call it? Boat maintenance would probably take about half the time it does now, away from the marine environment. I would sure miss the blue ocean, my comfortable sportfisher, and the great fishing action I've enjoyed over the years here, but there's really no hope for things to turn around here. The train has left the station.
 
Wow! I never thought I'd see the day! The infamous Captain Ron is leaving Florida? Grab the flag on your way out...

You pretty much summed up the reasons we packed up the truck and moved to the woods last year. You won't regret it at all. Heck, I just spent a long lunch skiing runs at the local hill and enjoying the spectacular scenery from the top of the lifts. On a clear day like today you can see Mt. Washington's peak sparkling white in the distance. I have plenty of large lakes in short reach and the ocean is only an hour away if I get the urge. Plus it's uncrowded, friendly, and a much more reasonable cost of living.

I love the change of seasons, the scenery, and the clean air. You will too. So does this mean you're taking up bass fishing?

Want to borrow my lucky hat?
Bass%20and%20I.jpg
 
The only flag left is the one Trump flies over Mara-Lago and it's on a 90' pole...too high for me and the Palm Beach police would probably frown on me trying to skinny up that one anyway.

I've seen a bass. I usually troll with rigged baits about that size. Since there are no wahoo, tunas, or marlin to hook up in fresh water, what do you do with a bass when you catch one?

Your description of your area sounds nice, except for the parts about the ski runs and lifts and the sparkling white stuff. You gotta remember...I own a few pairs of shorts, some Guy Harvey shirts (a couple without fish blood stains), and five pairs of Top-Siders (one for special occasions). I used to have a sweater for those frigid Fla evenings when it would drop into the upper 60s, but I had to use it for a hull buffing a couple of years ago. I'm not interested in buying and wearing anything that can't be packed into a weekend duffer that will sit on top of the Kalik case in the cabin. So, all that talk about seasons and scenery other than bikinis and weigh-in stations just doesn't turn my head.

I didn't say this was going to be easy for me and I'm not even looking forward to it, but I'm seeing the end of this chapter and am looking for the least painful options.

If that's the same bad hat you had a few years ago, I'll pass. I have a Caterpillar hat somewhere that will probably suffice.
 
I hear you Ron, my wardrobe had to undergo quite a transformation. Now the t-shirts are covered up by sweatshirts most days. The top siders are for around the house supplemented by Rocky Timberwolfs for outdoors. I still don't do sweater though.

And yes, I still have the famous hat...
 
Hard to read that so many boaters are planning on leaving S.F. I do understand what you all are saying but still makes me kinda sad, especially for the RO's Iv met.

Ron, We have never met but I feel like we have and have heard good things about you. I know you love the ocean and chasing the Sails and Whoos, as I do and be sure that you would be welcome to come back and fish with us any time. I sure would welcome the fishing tips and advise that I know you could bring.
Ill camo. the swim platform with Sargassum and will leave the Crocs at home.
 
Thanks for the offer, Joe. I can't wait to hear the explanation to your wife when I show up at the front door one day holding three rods, a package of ballyhoo, a case of beer and a duffle bag. She will be so impressed. Keep the swim platform clean. I'd like to try landing a fish from one of those. That has to be what they are for...I've never seen anyone swimming on one, although I have seen them used very effectively as a bumper when backing into a slip.
 
Ron, After 48 years, my wife is not surprised by any one or any thing that shows up at the door. Just don't show up in high heels and a mini skirt, she may not say "Oh, you must be one of Joe's boating buddies"
Gaffed a few kings from the platform, couple tried to get away with my Gaff, had to go in after it a few times. "SOME TIMES THE FISH WINS"
 
Well, the admiral and I have finally surfaced in Georgia....we got out of Florida while the gettin' was good (well, not all that good since the house in South Florida still hasn't sold, but hopefully that's about to change)...

I've got to say it has been nice to wake up to a beautiful Georgia coastal sunrise the last few mornings, take the dog for a walk and have to actually wear a jacket to do it (although at 37 degrees I don't think I'll mind it warming up maybe in the 40's at Sunrise -- I'm still rebelling a bit by wearing flip-flops even in the cold morning air!)...

We still love South Florida and will keep the condo there to have a bit of a retreat, but after being here for just a few days I can see why people love it here...I just hope they don't all start showing up!
 
i must say that if it wasn'tfor the need to be on warm blue waters year round, i'd consider moving as well, especially if i had to put up with traffic, congestion, etc... like most people.

things are getting t be ridiculusly expensive down here as well...

PS
Eric... thks for the stove and dw ! worked out great !!! the stove fit perfectly in my ex's condo, allowing me to use the 24" she had on the boat, finally getting rid of the old coil stove...
 
Glad they worked out Pascal...it was a shame to have them just sitting in the garage! Next time we're down I'll let you know and see about getting together for a cold one...
 
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